Ode to My Best Friend
I jump out.
Everyone around us is yelling, "Surprise!"
Her hands go to her mouth in confusion as the pieces settle into place. It's me. I'm here. On the West Coast. With the rest of the girls she loves. When we embrace, the smell of her hair takes me back to the smell of the house she grew up in. And her mother is asking us to set the table for dinner.
I fall asleep to her scratching my arm. Something feels too natural about it. Like nothing has changed, no time has passed. We've been laying in this bed..or a bed.. exchanging arm scratches for forever. How could I have missed these arm scratches when we haven't moved from this bed in over a quarter of a century?
I inch my way out to sit next to her on a fallen log. As we stare up at the waterfall, we discuss the trees and roots around us, trying to figure out safe routes to climb higher. I look back at her and we're 7 again, climbing the trees behind my house. Learning how to hold our weight. Seeing how far we can go.
We reach the snowcap top of the mountain and snow is falling in thick flakes around us. She is behind the wheel, navigating the snow and winding roads. Feeling the worry in the car, she announces, "I want you all to know that your safety is my top priority!" We all giggle. The tension dissipates immediately. Without seeing my face, she knows what I need to hear. Like she has always known what I need to hear.
I take a deep breath. Like I have my whole life.
I'm embracing her again, but this time, for goodbye. She separates from me unexpectedly, wanting to share a memory that surfaced. "Do you remember?" she asks, "When we were little, how we'd lay in bed next to each other and say our nightly prayers? And at the end, we would list all of the people we love, who we were grateful for? Recite the names of family members, friends, and even pets? Do you remember?"
To keep from crying, I smile and hug her again. I think quietly to myself, "I do remember. Because I still pray for you every night."
I hope our past continues to blur into our present every time we're together. Time feels so oddly flexible when I'm with you.
Thanks for sharing this life with me.
(Photo: Anna Ward Photography)